Probably almost listenable if you’re taking powerful drugs.
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It would be expected that a review of some Labour MPs attempting a Christmas song to raise awareness of the exploitation of workers would include some sweeping statements about 2016, their party being in crisis, and a vague pun about Momentum, all with an underlining political message along the lines of “Awh, aren’t these Labour MPs good for fighting for the workers?” or “Why don’t they actually do their job and make a difference themselves?” Unfortunately, none of those things will happen here. Several Labour MPs got together to release a record, and will be judged so accordingly.
By doing so, I can declare ‘National Living Rage’ to be the worst thing I have heard in my entire life. On several instances people are out of time, there are moments where they have rammed extra syllables into lines to try and fit in the new lyrics to Band Aid’s melody, and I’m afraid to say the line “Your lunches have been took” doesn’t even make grammatical sense.
This song, if you can call it that, is the musical equivalent of a child’s first drawing that a parent reluctantly puts up on the fridge. It’s awful, and they know it’s awful, but once it’s been done you can’t hide it. There is literally nothing going for it. Your child is never going to be Da Vinci so they shouldn’t even try, yet they look so proud, with a beaming smile on their face as they hand over their most treasured piece of creative work yet.
To end on a cheery “Merry Christmas everybody” after three-and-a-half minutes of reminding us how people struggle to make ends meet at Christmas time is a final nail in the coffin. I want a bit of whatever the person behind this was taking, just to see if I’m capable of making something equally horrific.
Merry Christmas indeed.
‘National Living Rage’ is probably out now but let’s be honest: who cares?