The Curve #8

After a few weeks off for Christmas, we’ve returned with your weekly news roundup. To bring you into the new year we’ve only got the craziest and most pointless news stories, topping all of last years issues. Think Cameron Diaz’s pubic hair secrets, celebrity selfies and Kanye West inspired money.

1) Coinye West

I ain’t saying you’re a gold digger, but we know you want to get your hands on some Coinye West. Due to launch later this month, the cryptocurrency is inspired by Kanye West, and is being marketed as an easy alternative to Bitcoin. A virtual money system, Bitcoin became popular last year, being valued at as much as £600 each. Speaking to Noisey, the creators of the Coinye system said they chose to name it after West because he’s a “trendsetter” but admitted they are a bit scared that they might anger him. As if he needed anything else to boost his ego.

2) There’s something about hairy

Normally the picture of sophistication, Cameron Diaz has come out with some rather unusual statements. The actress has said that she can’t understand why women have laser hair removal, and has even gone onto say that she believes that pubic hair serves as “a pretty draping”, and she likes her vagina “fully dressed” so someone special can “unwrap it” like a gift. That’s a little bit too much information for us Cam.

3) Gold digger

The Kardashian clan are always tabloid fodder, and people are obsessed with their comings and goings, but sometimes it gets taken a little too far. When central figure Kim posts anything on Instagram it must be newsworthy, and her baby North West is an illusive figure (shocking that her parents didn’t sell pictures to a magazine!) so it is unfortunately inevitable that people have snatched up her latest photo, of little ‘Nori’ holding Kim’s 15 carat engagement ring, calling it the height of poetic metaphors. But let’s face it, Miss Kardashian (or will she be Mrs West?) is no Walt Whitman. Let’s keep some perspective now, people.

4) Royal selfie

While some may think that the monarchy is an ancient institution, some of the members of the British Royal family are clearly firmly part of the present, embracing one of 2013’s hottest trends – the selfie. First it was Prince Charles who was unwittingly part of a little boy’s selfie, now Prince William has shown that he’s down with the kids by taking a selfie with a twelve year old school girl, even going as far as actually taking the picture himself when the young girl was too nervous to press the button on her mum’s smart phone.

5) Mid-knife crisis

In super shocking news this week, a celebrity is planning to get plastic surgery. Crazy, huh? Well not really, but Robbie Williams has come out and said that he’ll go under the knife when he turns 40. He’s said he thinks he’s going through a midlife crisis, and is going to have “everything done” including liposuction and a face lift. When he appeared on The Graham Norton show he admitted to having a hair transplant when he was in LA even though he didn’t need one. Definitely a midlife crisis.